Our miracle RAINBOW BABY BOY arrived 8/2018

1st IVF = BFN
2nd IVF = Baby A, born May 2015
3rd IVF = Miscarriage at 14 weeks
4th IVF = BFN
After we paid for 5th IVF, positive pregnancy without IVF!

Because the important moments in life just don’t fit in a status update! I started this blog when I was training for my first ½ Ironman, (70.3 miles) to record what I hoped would be growth and progress but ended up being a huge learning experience. Although fitness is one of the key ingredients to a happy life, it certainly isn't the only ingredient. My blog has evolved to document growth, progress and setbacks in other areas too. From my surprise proposal in Rome and wedding in the fall of 2013, to Mom's devastating stage IV cancer diagnosis and death 2 weeks after I found out I was pregnant. Who knows what shape it will take, but thanks for being along for the ride.

Friday, December 6, 2024

November, 2024 - On Prayer and Thanksgiving

"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever." Psalm 118:1
Isn't it nice to have a whole month devoted to being thankful? To be reminded of all of our blessings? We are happier when we are thankful. Studies show this. More specifically, there is a proven substantial positive correlation between gratitude and life satisfaction. We are also happier when we believe in God. Yet sadly, references to religion have been largely removed from our secular, modern society. 

Did you know that when Congress asked President Washington to declare America's first National Day of Thanksgiving and Prayer, his proclamation of Nov. 26, 1789, noted, "It is the duty of all Nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey his will, to be grateful for his benefits, and humbly to implore his protection and favor."

Part of what makes America so great is that you are free to practice whatever religion you want, including the choice to not practice religion at all. Religious freedom can include having no religion, being an atheist, or an agnostic. But as Vivek points out in this video, the ironic part is that while we do not have a government that punishes people for their lack of belief, the government does punish people for expressing their faith in God. Vivek calls for a return to a culture where even people who believe in God are able to authentically be themselves in all areas of their lives without fear of criticism or punishment.

America thrives when we respect all beliefs. Gov't shouldn't push religion, but neither should it hinder it.

Presently, people with no faith or with different faiths or ideas and beliefs are not afraid to speak up. They are very vocal and often the loudest or only voices in the room. Meanwhile, those with traditional values are afraid to bring up their perspectives or faith, even (especially?) around the water cooler at work. This needs to change, and I believe it is changing. Since Trump's assassination attempt, he has started publically referencing God, and he won the popular vote. I don't think that he won simply because Biden is the worst (and most corrupt!) president in recent history, and no one can afford groceries. I believe there is a resurgence and a desire to go back to one Nation, under God, because the veil has been lifted, and what the world looks like without religion has been exposed. Hedonism, doing whatever you want, whenever you want, is not as great as those darn hippies led us to believe.

In that vein, this month, I am continuing to bring God and prayer into our children's daily lives. Not just before meals and at bedtime, but in regular conversations, on the drive to school when we see a beautiful sunrise. Praying over our pets when they are injured or sick, and in the content we listen to, such as music, books, and podcasts. I have also started praying over them. This is something that I did not grow up with, and for this reason, it feels a bit odd to me. Okay, more than a bit odd - it feels downright unnatural as if I am casting some type of magic forcefield. But I went to a mother-daughter retreat a few months ago where we did this, and I really liked it. Do you know what praying over someone is? You literally place your hands up toward them and say your prayer out loud. I had a husband and wife pray over me last May when I explained that I was on leave and didn't know why, and it was so touching and comforting.


I am working hard to cultivate and increase my faith in God and have made some great progress recently thanks to an amazing book. I will share more about this in an upcoming post. 

And now, back to our regularly scheduled updates! We started the month with a trip to Disneyland and Oak Glen. My brother went with us to Oak Glen, to the old school house like we had gone to with Dad. He continues to be on my mind daily, in a wistful way, but fortunately, I do not find myself tearful over his loss. There is not a lot of space or room for being sad in all that our daily lives entail, and that's a good thing. I could go there, certainly, but I don't. I do, however, whisper I wish you were here, Dad at least once a day and bring him up in conversations with the kids. I have even found my brother and I talking about some of his more difficult moments and having a laugh over them, as he would if he were here.  



We had a few friends over for the election, which went better than any of us could have dreamed of. By the end of the night, we were all out in the streets with sparklers from our wedding, doing the Trump dance!


Too cool for British rule!

We added a new little critter to our family this month—a hedgehog! Our daughter wanted one for Christmas, and it would not arrive on Christmas unless I kept it hidden in the attic! So, I did the best I could to still keep it a surprise, by not telling the kids where we were going. We got into the car and went for a drive - for a surprise. They really had no idea. As I pulled into the Target parking lot a few cities over and approached the breeder, their reaction was pure joy!

Introducing...Mrs. Tiggy Winkle
Kindergarten feast!


As Thanksgiving drew near, we celebrated our 11 year wedding anniversary (13 years together!) followed by my hubby's birthday.
The love of my life - forever and always
I started decorating for Christmas, and we had Thanksgiving at home with just the four of us. It was low-key and not hectic at all. 


Aut was a huge help this year. I went for a 3-mile run that morning and asked her to peel the potatoes. No one likes peeling potatoes. I figured that she would do a few, and I would finish the rest when I returned. I was pleasantly surprised to learn that she did all of them, and also washed and cut them! She helped me make an apple pie, and set the table. We watched the Twilight Zone, and they played video games with Dad. After dinner, we went on a beautiful walk behind our home with the dogs.



She also had swim practice that morning, gearing up for her first swim meet in December. I'm pretty proud of her for getting in the pool on Thanksgiving when it was cold and windy, and (this is the important part!) not complaining about it!

While we weren't able to see my brother on Thanksgiving because he's working so many hours with UPS, he treated us all to an amazing lunch for my hubby's birthday. 
I'm proud of how well he is doing, and I love that we have remained close since Dad died...possibly even closer. We recently started ending our daily phone calls how Mom and Dad did, with "God Bless" which sounds more like Ga-bless.

We ended the month with one last trip to Legoland before our passes expired. We will take a break for a year or two, but then, we will be back!

Tuesday, December 3, 2024

From Chaos to Common Sense: Why Trump's Win Feels Like a Such a Victory for Freedom and Fairness.


I have been waking up every day since Trump won the election in a historic landslide with so much enthusiasm and hope for the future of our country and the country our grandchildren will inherit. Every day, there seems to be more good news, from all of his cabinet picks to the establishment of the DOGE and so many other awesome developments - like the fact that Canada and Mexico have agreed to limit all of the people coming through their countries to ours out of fear of a 25% tariff. As promised, Trump is already improving the state of our great nation before he even officially returns to the white house. I love the creation of the DOGE as well as the proposed dismantling of the racist federal DEI mandates. Walmart is already rolling them back! But I have so much more enthusiasm than I ever expected - even when compared to the first time he won. Why is that? This post took me a little while because I was wondering that myself. But I finally put my finger on it- Trump’s overwhelming win isn't just a victory for him—it feels like a victory for people like me, who knew that we were not the awful people that Democrats have tried really hard to make us out to be, with the help of the now exposed legacy media, of course. While we will be unpacking the effects of this landslide victory for years and decades to come, here is my humble take.

Let's start with the excessive government control and misinformation. Remember COVID? When the government stepped in and told us that they were protecting us "for our own good"? Stay home, mask up, keep your distance. Shut down schools, restaurants - even outdoor playgrounds in Orange County were wrapped with caution tape, rendering them unusable. National parks, like Joshua Tree put up the CLOSED sign, restricting people from entering ... the outdoors. The park behind our home, CLOSED. It was all about "protecting others," right? And most people went along with it. Those who didn’t? We were labeled conspiracy theorists. But it was only supposed to be for two weeks. And then the goalpost was moved on us, and it became even longer. A friend of mine couldn’t introduce her grandfather to his newest great-grandchild. Why? “For his protection.” He died alone, and she’ll never get that moment back. Not only did people die alone necessarily, but the fear and worry and dread that that could happen impacted - even traumatized - many of us. They created this fear and worry and robbed us of time with our loved ones in many cases. Even when Dad was hospitalized for COVID, I was not allowed to see him for about a month while he was in the COVID unit. Never mind that I had driven him to the ER (in the car, without masks, for over 15 minutes) and sat next to him in the waiting room for over three hours. Now that he was in the unit, he was completely restricted and cut off from the outside world at a time when he was most vulnerable. And this was in 2023! After we knew it was no more than a cold unless a person had underlying conditions (heart failure and leukemia in his case). I could go on and on with examples here - even newborn babies at Kaiser who were not allowed to see their mother for weeks if she tested positive! The Mom of my daughter's friend who worked in the NICU would meet mothers in the parking lot as they dropped off their breast milk like it was some kind of secretive drug deal. Can you imagine having a child - your first child - and not being able to see, touch, or hold them for WEEKS? Seriously, is that the kind of government we want? One that micromanages every aspect of our lives and leaves us disconnected and powerless? One that lies? No thanks.

Our daughter's kindergarten graduation. She is the only one without a useless mask.

And let’s not forget the cultural firestorm of the last few years. Suddenly, if you’re white—especially if you’re a white male—you are inherently racist. No discussion, no defense, and most importantly: no exceptions. I actually sat through training where a volunteer from the ADL flat-out told a teacher that her husband, whom they had never even met, was racist. Why? Simply because he was white. This teacher, who happens to be a minority, passionately defended him. She explained how he always stood up for marginalized groups, treated everyone with respect, and cited specific examples. It didn’t matter. The trainer insisted he was racist to his very core. In fact, being a racist was such a core of his being that it was not even detectable by him or anyone around him, apparently. My thoughts drifted to my father, who had lost a good job with the railroad because he defended a Native American on the job site who was wrongly accused. Also racist. What’s wrong with this picture? This rhetoric is divisive, unfair, untrue, and frankly, un-American.

Does racism exist? Sure it does. But labeling every Trump supporter as racist is absolutely insane. I do not personally know one Trump supporter who is racist. Labeling all of any group a certain way without knowing them and in spite of the facts is one of the very definitions of prejudice! 

prej·u·dice
/ˈprejədəs/
noun
  1. 1.
    preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience.
    "prejudice against people from different backgrounds"

That's how insane all of this is - gaslighting in its finest form. And what has the legacy media done in reaction to his amazing victory? They are turning on each other, with MSNBC now calling Hispanics white supremacists (you can't make this stuff up). How else can they explain the fact that even Texas/Mexico border towns that are 97% Hispanic have turned red in favor of Trump?

This is why Trump’s win makes me hopeful. It feels like a big, loud rejection of all that nonsense. His “America First” stance is a reminder that we don’t need a nanny state controlling our lives or global ideologies dictating how we think. We are Americans. We value freedom, fairness, and common sense. Trump’s leadership is like hitting the reset button—getting back to a place where people are judged by their character, not their skin color, and where the government serves us, not the other way around. Make common sense common again!

Okay, sure, it's easy to say that you are not racist. But the real proof is in the pudding. And by pudding, I mean what we tell our children. Allow me to explain. So, all of this legacy media discourse got into my head without realizing it. It suddenly felt shameful to be patriotic - as if that was some sort of symbol of not liking other countries? Or cultures? And it bothered me and caused me to do a lot of self-reflection. But the truest test came when I was in London in 2022, alone with just my son and daughter in the cab with me, and a petition between the driver, who could not hear us, and us. We had flown there with my father and brother for my Aunt Anna's wedding, a meaningful trip that I will always remain thankful that I took (thank you, Anna). 

On that trip, we hailed a cab from the Reading suburb to London. In the cab, on our way to the hotel, there were hundreds of Muslim women wearing burkas, completely covered with only slits for their eyes to be exposed. They were chanting and protesting, carrying signs as they walked in an orderly line around Hyde Park. From what I can gather, I think it may have been a counter-protest in reaction to the Masha Amini protests since they were in traditional dress. In any case, my daughter asked me, "Mommy, are those bad people?" I responded with the truth: "You can't tell. You cannot tell by looking at someone whether they are bad or good. Someone could look just like you and be one of the worst people in the world."

The pandemic and the cultural chaos of the past few years have been wake-up calls. We saw how easily fear can lead to overreach, how quickly people will accept labels and guilt without question. But we’ve also seen people standing up, saying “Enough.” That’s the spirit that gives me hope. It’s about rejecting authoritarianism in all its forms—whether it’s government overreach or divisive ideologies—and embracing the idea that we’re stronger when we come together, not when we’re torn apart.

But it’s more than that. Trump’s overwhelming win didn’t just feel like a victory for him—it felt like a victory for people like me. For so long, it felt like we were the minority, quietly questioning what was happening but too often dismissed or labeled for not falling in line. We have all seen homelessness and lawlessness on the rise - especially in California, where voters decided stealing up to $950 was no big deal or having hardened drugs was just a ticket-able offense. Trump's win made me realize I’m not alone. Millions of others DO feel the same way, and that’s a powerful thing. I’m not gloating, but I’ll admit I feel vindicated in a way. It’s comforting to know that so many people are rejecting the overreach, the division, and the fear-based narratives.

My unbridled enthusiasm for Trump's win isn’t about rubbing it in anyone’s face—it’s about hope. Hope that we’re moving back toward a nation where freedom, fairness, and unity matter more than fear and division. It’s about believing in the kind of America I’ve always wanted for my children—a place where they can grow up proud, independent, and free. And knowing that I’m not alone in that hope? That’s the best part of all.

Wednesday, November 20, 2024

October, 2024

We started our annual Halloween parties in 2018, after we moved into our new home. Aug was less than three months old, and Aut was three and a half. Back then, we talked about making it an annual event and once the kids were in school, inviting their friends and families. We weren't sure if we would keep it up, but I'm proud to say that we haven't missed a year, not even during covid, when we still had a great turn-out.

First Annual, 2018

Seventh Annual, 2024

This year, we had about 200 people - our highest number to date. As with any event, it's not just a day of that the kids enjoy, but the anticipation of it all. We picked our theme last year: ZOMBIES. Our amazing prop guy, Jeff with Party Perfections, set up this super spooky zombie maze in the driveway and part of the garage. We even had a fog machine. Kids had fun going through it again and again. The zombie actors were to ask kids what scare level they wanted: a 1, 2, or 3 and then announce it to the other zombies so that it could be tailored to be tame or terrifying. 

We did not have a costume contest, but if we had, the award would have gone to my friend Christian's hubby, who remained in character all night. I was having a conversation with him about their recent trip to Romania when he launched in, about how he could not stand Governor New-Scum. It took me a second to remember that he was still in character.

There were so many amazing costumes! I love that people went all out. I tried to stay in our foyer, greet people upon arrival, and take photos of them when I could. Instead of a 360-degree video booth or a photo booth, we had a sketch artist. They were great, but I want to go back to having a photo booth of some sort next year. And a mechanical bull! I'm not sure how I'll fit that into our theme, but it's going to happen!


Although the cost of this party was the price of a small vacation, it was well worth it. This is how I view it: When we go on vacation together as a family, we build new memories together as we share new experiences. The same is true for our parties, except that it is not just the four of us but our friend/community/school group as well. People who will be in our lives and the lives of our children for years to come.


At the end of the night, a few friends stayed later, talking by the fire for hours, long afte the kids went swimming. 

We did two fun projects this month - both were ghosts. First, using black construction paper to make ghosts peering out through the front windows. Since they were not visible enough due to our black out shades, I added some battery-operated candles behind them, so they would be more visible (and eerie) from the street. The second project was created by soaking cheesecloth in Mod Podge, then draping it over a balloon on top of a vase to dry.


Exciting news - I finally completed all of my doctorate coursework this month and entered the dissertation phase of my program - woohoo!

This month, it was a decade since Mom died. A whole decade which is so hard to believe. How different all of our lives would be with her here. 


Aug had his first official Jog-a-thon, and Aut had her 4th! They each raised $200 to support the school, thanks to Grandma and Andrea and, of course, yours truly. I took some time from work and volunteered to mist the runners as they did their laps.

Honey Boo Boo continues to delight and amaze us with her boundless positivity. She is always happy, and her tail is always wagging. She loves everything in life, but especially trying to sneak cat food, jumping up on the couch and bed as if she were still a small puppy, face licks, and running off-leash on the trails behind our home. 

This month, we finally checked out the Goathill Junction Train Station which offers free train rides a few weekends a month. This was something I've wanted to do for years, and I was worried the kids would be a tad bit too old. But they weren't at all! We all had a blast, and got slurpees afterward. 

We attended the Friend's Church carnival, checked out the spooky houses in old-town orange, and on Halloween, I dressed up at work (group theme - 1960s) wearing my mother-in-law's dress, hand-sewn by her sister Mary.
I love, love, love this time of year, especially the anticipation of Thanksgiving and Christmas when our hearts feel warmer and fuller than they do at any other time of the year.